8 Days: This Post is Potentially Blasphemous

I've decided to create a study group out of Book of Mormon prophets. I've made study groups out of Federation officers, M*A*S*H characters, and Disney princes, and I'm willing to bet that a study group of prophets would be much more productive. And since I'm going to BYU, they'd fit right in.

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Nephi would be in charge of keeping me from slacking off. He'd say, "Behold, my soul is rent with anguish because of you, and my heart is pained; I fear lest ye shall fail your English class. And now, if the Lord has such great power, and has wrought so many miracles among the children of men, how is it that he cannot instruct thee, that you should do your homework?"

Mormon would be the note-taker. "And now I, Mormon, make a record of the things which I have both seen and heard concerning our biology lecture."

Alma would keep my spirits up when I start feeling like a loser. "But behold, Jessica, ye ought to know as I do know, that inasmuch as ye shall keep the commandments of God ye shall prosper in the university."

Helaman would be the one to keep us on task. "And now, my friends, remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the professors shall send forth their pop quizzes, yea, their term papers, yea, when all their homework and their mighty exams shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if students build they cannot fall."

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And I would sit in the Harold B. Lee Library, huddled around a table with these big, spiritually brawny men, scribbling down notes and working out problems as I was meant to: with the scriptures.