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Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Verbatim Phone Conversation with My Dad

Me: Hello?

Dad: Hey, Jess.

Me: Oh! Hi, Dad.

Dad: I need to talk to you. I need to make sure we've got something cleared up.

Me(*warily*): Er, okay...

Dad(*strategic wording*): What . . . is your understanding . . . of when you are supposed to kill me?

Me: ...uh, it's before you turn 104, right?

Dad: Yes, yes. But I mean, is that, like, the day of my 103rd birthday? Or the day before I turn 104?

Me: I'd say the day before you turn 104.

Dad: So, that'd be March 1st, then?

Me: Yeah, yeah I guess so.

Dad: Okay, good. I thought maybe you'd be confused and think you were supposed to kill me on my 103rd birthday, and that would just be wrong.

Me: No, no. It's definitely just before you turn 104. Because you want to live to be 103, but not any older.

Dad: Right.

Me: Right.

Dad: . . . Okay! Well, as long as that's settled, I'll see you later! Love ya!

Me: Love you too, Dad. Bye.

Dad: Bye!

5 comments:

Robin said...

Unfortunately, that is an accurate representation of what happened.

Ever feel like you don't live in the same universe as everyone else?

The Erin said...

Give that man a high five for me, will you?
Your dad is the best XD

Anonymous said...

Witnessed in part. This is both awesome ad factual.

Robin said...

Unfortunately, that is exactly what happened.

MaggieJo said...

LOVE it!